This Years MTV VMAs Were Amazing

Video. Music. Awards.
Three little words that bring a smile to my heart as I look back at the debacle that was this years VMAs.
Apparently the TV station Empty-V plays music videos in-between episodes of Hogan Knows Best and My Super Sweet 16. And apparently some people care about pop music in 2007. Thus, this past weekend the world was treated to a non-stop display of organized showing off by some of the planets more vacuous ‘personalities’.

In honor of the train-wreck that was this years VMAs I hereby announce the first edition of the annual Living The Good Lie VMA top Three.

#3 Kanye West Is Sensitive.
Preppy wannabe tough guy rapper Kanye West chose the 2007 VMAs to make it clear why he wears teddy bear sweaters. BECAUSE HE IS A MOMMYS BOY. Poor little Kanye threw a temper tantrum backstage when he didn’t win any awards. A big tough rapper getting his panties in a twist because a company owned by rich old white men didn’t give him a shiny award.



Kanye: You Suck.

#2 Middle Aged Men Are Tough.
Pamela Anderson must be one hell of a good lay because her two ex-husbands decided to put their handbags down, take off their earrings and slap each other. Kid Rock and Tommy Lee put on the worst display of girl-fighting this side of Kanye West in a room full of teddy bears. These two has-beens played “hold me back, hold me back” with their buddies until security rushed in and broke up the cuddle-fest.



Real tough guys, really.

#1 Oops She Blew It Again.
Britney Spears Is Awful.
So her performance was meant to be a come-back. It was not. What it was was entertaining. In fact I would have to put this little lipsyched shimmy fest down as the best thing I have ever seen on Empty-V. She didn’t sing, she didn’t dance, she didn’t do anything that could remotely be called a performance really, oh, and she dressed like a two dollar hooker. In other words: It was AMAZING!

EDIT: Bloody MTV and their bloody lawyers! alll evidence of this earth shattering event has been cease and desisted from the internet... I offer you instead, a word from Britneys spokesman:



Thank you Britney, Thank you Empty-V. See you next year kids.